I Like Brits, Okay?

[gothrockrulz]

LOL.

So, last night while I was working a closing shift, I was walking to the fitting room to cover the break of the lady posted there. Outside of the fitting room she walked up to me and told me to get in there quickly so I can talk to this handsome guy approaching to try on a shirt.



Meek and mild little girl that I am, I did as told--but she followed me, so that we both ended up advising the poor, naive chump NOT to wear a plaid dress shirt beneath a diamond-pattern sweater. (Doesn't everybody know instinctively that clashing patterns clash? Or am I just being a ruthless fashion snob?)

After he toddled off, I said, "He wasn't all that good-looking."

She insisted he was, and I said maybe, but he wasn't my type, even with those muscles.

"What is your type?" she asked.

"I like guys that don't sit around watching football all day," I said.

She threw up her hands. "There aren't any like that."

"I know! Not here."

"Oh, so you like foreign guys?" She looked amused. "What kind?"

"I like Brits. And guys that like books."

She laughed. "Oh, you like BORING guys!"

I made a face at her. "You're just saying that 'cuz you've never seen Lord of the Rings!"

Later on, the same apparently cute guy that had no idea how to dress himself came up to the registers while I and a couple other girls were there. And those girls went bananas over him.

After he'd left, what little restraint they had vanished, and they freaked out even more. You know, the usual teen girl stuff--"OMG, he is SO CUTE! I thought I was going to die! I need a boyfriend so bad. Did you SEE HIM?! OMG! OMG!" (It's so ironic to realize that, of all the "young" associates, I'm one of the oldest. And I'm still mild and shy enough to make people think I'm one of the younger ones!)

Listening to them, I snickered to myself. If some clueless dude had that effect on them, I'd love to see their reactions to someone far more attuned to how girls think, like Gackt or Hyde or Kamijo. (Once they got over their initial shock that said J-rockers were, indeed, guys, that is.)

LOL.

I'm starting to think I should make record more of the funny little things that happen at work. Stuff like this happens all the time.

Comments

[baggiesfaninuk.livejournal.com]

I guess it would be a boring old world if we all desired and admired the same....but your story amused me. And a smile is a great way to start the day! :)

[gothrockrulz.livejournal.com]

Glad to put a smile on your face! :)

[rhoda-rants.livejournal.com]

Heh. I have had similar conversations with a coworker, but only because my tastes are wildly different from hers. "OMG, so cuuuute!" "Uh. Who, that guy? Why?" If Pretty Eyes from Starbucks comes in though, she knows to send him to my register. (Or would have done, if I still worked the register. Blog coming soon about how much I love baking now. Heee!)

Regarding J-rockers and their relentless prettiness: OH GOD YES. I keep waiting for the day that certain Neanderthal-like hairy "manly" men in the Western world finally, finally figure out that questioning effeminate men and their sexuality doesn't make the girls go nuts over them any less. Which is to say, quite a lot of us LIKE pretty men, and clearly they're all just jealous and too homophobic to shave, fix their hair and put on some eyeliner, goddammit.

Regarding this: "Doesn't everybody know instinctively that clashing patterns clash? Or am I just being a ruthless fashion snob?"

*ahem* I'm, ah, guilty of one or more instances of horrendously clashing patterns. I'm wearing stripes with plaid right now, and I'm not even joking. I know technically, that's supposed to be wrong, but somehow it works for me. In fact, it's one of the reasons for the sub-heading of my journal: "Motley Core."

Funny story: When I did my semester abroad in London, I was in a Shakespeare class and one of our final projects was to get into small groups and perform a scene from Twelfth Night in front of the rest of the class. I got the role of Feste, the fool, and went scrambling through my closet to find something that looked like a jester's costume. The word "motley" actually refers to a hodge-podge of patterns and loud colors that don't quite match, and I had plenty of those, so that's what I went with for the costume. After the class I was going to change, but my partner--who wound up being one of my best friends (and got me hooked on both Neil Gaiman and manga/anime, incidentally)--stopped me and said, "Actually, I think it suits you. It would look completely wrong and weird on anyone else, but since it's you, it works."

I don't quite get it either, but I agree. Plus, my first instinct when it comes to someone telling me I can't wear X with Y is to say, "Like Hell I can't!" and find something even more offensive to top it off. But that's just me. :D

[gothrockrulz.livejournal.com]

I'm looking forward to hearing how you like baking. (Incidentally, I started Sunshine last night. I'm inspired by all the backstory the author seamlessly weaves into the narrative, but I must admit, some parts seem trippy beyond belief. Now I can't help wondering if the author ever wished she could just burn a little incense, concentrate, and end up lying naked with whatever guy was on her mind at the time . . .)

I think the reason why many western men don't wear eyeliner is because it doesn't really work on them. (Example: The vocalist of Green Day in the American Idiot music video. Guyliner doesn't quite suit him--and that's not just my bias for J-rockers talking. Okay, maybe it is. I'm not a Green Day fan, but I'm ready to cry with relief whenever American Idiot comes on the TVs at the bowling alley where I work, because it's a relief from constant assaults by Disney pop crap.)

Of course, Johnny Depp, as always, is an exception. That man was born to wear eyeliner. :D

You can pull off clashing patterns? Wow. I really didn't think anybody could. Motley indeed. *high five*

[rhoda-rants.livejournal.com]

Good lord, you read fast! I just started rereading it, and I love the way she does the backstory too. Her narrative style takes getting used to, but I love it. The main character's attitude reminds me so much of myself it's a little scary. (Although I like to think I've gotten less antisocial.)

Guy liner is not for everyone, this is true. Still, the point I'm really trying to make here is that it would be nice if guys who don't care for it or even "get" it wouldn't hurl nasty slurs and whatnot at those who can pull it off.

I got several compliments on that outfit, actually! Yesterday, I mean. Mostly about the socks. (I have a thing for bizarre, brightly colored and patterned socks.)

[gothrockrulz.livejournal.com]

When I have the free time to allow for it, I read like greased lightning. (If only I could write like greased lightning, too . . .) You're right about the style requiring some getting used to--I was encouraged and discouraged at the same time that she could stop the action for so long in order to explain something in the backstory. I admit, there were a few parts I started skimming through. And the slang still baffles me. Must be regional or something. LOL.

People were staring at your socks? O.o